Breaking and Entering

I went out to get the nanny, and the door locked behind me. Of course, the babies were inside. I told my son to run downstairs and open up the back door. But  our doors are very old, and he couldn’t maneuver the lock. So I told him to go upstairs and grab the keys. I wanted him to throw them over the balcony so I could open the back door. But we were all beginning to panic and cry. All except the nanny, who just stood there doing nothing. I started to get really scared, my son was screaming that he wanted me and the baby was hysterical. So I threw a rock through the window. (It was kind of awesome).

Subsequently, I have discovered that my nanny is secretly an Emerson student who is majoring in script writing for television. I now have a fear that in a few years I will see a situation comedy about 2 lesbians, one of whom locks herself outside the house with the kids inside. But if this does happen, I don’t want my character to be a lawyer. I want to be a lion tamer or a sniper.

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