Late Summer

My internship is over, and I am a little sad about it. I really liked that court. They threw us a little party, and I took the boy with me. He charmed the pants off everyone by pretending to be shy and hiding his head in my skirt. He would then stick his head out and pretend to laugh at their cooing. He was playing them all like a violin.

They gave us all a little certificate of recognition for helping out. I liked it there so much that I am actually considering becoming a defense attorney. This surprises me because I have a real problem with criminals. They can cause so much havoc and chaos. But I had a couple of revelations during the internship. First, most of these people are not actually criminals, they are alcoholics and addicts. The OUIs, possession and theft all have to do with their addictions. I wouldn’t have any problem defending these people. (There are some genuinely bad people, however).

Second, I had the realization that the only thing that keeps the government from becoming an authoritarian regime is the justice system. And the system relies on the presumption of innocence, and you need defense attorneys to defend that presumption. Otherwise, all of America would be Guantanamo Bay. You are a criminal because the government says you are. (I know most of you probably figured this out in your 9th grade civics class, but I’m dense – k).

There are some practical considerations. I have become friends with an attorney who left her big firm job when she became pregnant with triplet boys. She works four days a week and makes about 90,000 a year. She says she realized she could only do one thing well, and she chose being a mom. However, she is a great attorney, and your lucky if you get appointed her as your counsel.

Being a prosecutor is kind of out because they work their butts off for $37,000. Some of them even have second jobs.  I’m not agreeing to that.

I am still thinking about it, but I would get to be in court and I would feel like I am doing something important. Plus, I could help Sue out with that neighbor of hers – should she need my help.


5 thoughts on “Late Summer

  1. Oh the poor wittle addicts are so sick.

    Cry me a river already. I get that they’re entitled to a defense. Ever heard of bootstraps? Don’t spend all that time in school to defend a bunch of degenerates who can’t even pay for a lawyer.

    The neighbor is an entirely different issue. He’s a real fucker and I’ll pay for my defense.

    I just need a plan…

    Scratch that, there’s no pre-meditation.

  2. Face it, if Sue goes ahead and takes care of that neighbor, there’s already a paper trail a mile long, and she’s gonna need someone slicker and more at ease with being an asshole–like any one of the fine folks who worked to defend Enron.

    And in the meantime, I’m with you. Defend the addicts. Anything so the govt doesn’t get away with more of what they get away with. I actually checked–LA County public defenders start at 60K a year. And they work normal hours. Not that I can afford even my bourbon on that, but I’m still holding out for the rich and slightly ugly man who will take care of me forever. Or Daddy worried enough to buy me a foreclosure south of the boulevard. Besides, who needs Louboutins when you can have world fucking peace?

  3. Have you ever considered being a professional law clerk? They make great money as government work goes, have normal hours, and have lots of challenging, interesting work. Someone left my firm to do that and she makes about $100,000 and works 9 – 5.

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