Overheard at the tattoo parlor
Tattoo artist #1: So this guy comes in and I asked him what he wants, and he says, “I want a big penis.” He wants me to tattoo shadows on his dick to make it look bigger. And I was like, “Dude, if I touch your dick, that makes me a sex worker and it’s going to cost you. $3,000.”
Tattoo artist #2: “You’re already a sex worker.”
Me: Freaking out in the corner at the thought of tattooing a penis, though I do not, in fact, have a penis. I was also thinking that $3,000 would make you a pretty well paid sex worker.
My tattoo is halfway done. Yes, I went and got a tattoo while my wife was 9 months pregnant and miserable waiting for the baby. My tattoo artist said that made me a typical husband. I will post a pic as soon as possible. Of both the baby and the tattoo.
We are trying some herbs tonight to try and kick start labor. We’ll see how it goes.
Oh, Googs. You tickle me pink.
January 8, 2010 at 2:36 am
Typical husband… without the penis that is.
January 8, 2010 at 2:54 am
Castor oil is what you need.
January 8, 2010 at 3:37 pm
Hi atypical,
People have mentioned castor oil before. I don’t think she is down with it. And every natural method we have tried so far hasn’t produced any results. I think we are going to have to wait a week until the doctor tells us it’s time to use Western medicine and induce.
January 8, 2010 at 3:55 pm
if it’s small enough to need “enhanced shadows,” who the heck is looking at it in the light? there’s a reason s*x happens in the bedroom, with the lights out, under the covers… oh dear, i am a prude…. anyhooo, looking forward to pics, as i’m considering a tattoo, but still scared of kids…
January 9, 2010 at 1:53 am
Was this the tattoo you were thinking of getting a few months ago? (The pagan goddess?)
January 9, 2010 at 4:35 am
That’s exactly the one Adele.
Just Jenn – I will post pictures. It’s kind of hard that I broke this up. I needed a break, but now I know how much it hurts and I am dreading going back. But I can’t have a half done tattoo.
January 9, 2010 at 5:33 pm
Yuck to castor oil. Spicy chili may or may not have worked for me. I had chili for dinner on a Monday and woke up in labor at 2 am. Was at the hospital dilated to 4-5 by 9 am.
January 11, 2010 at 9:21 pm
Hi Rayne, I have trying to get her to eat something spicy. The problem is that she is a true New Englander. Her idea of spicy it totally different from what I think is spicy. I’m from Arizona. She thinks she is eating spicy things. I think she is eating stuff that is mildly flavored.
January 11, 2010 at 10:02 pm
Can’t wait for pictures!
January 12, 2010 at 3:08 am
ok…where is the pic of this tattoo?
February 10, 2010 at 1:44 am
Hey Maggie, it’s still healing. I will post a picture once it looks better.
February 11, 2010 at 1:56 pm