Jen and I were talking about family. Our family, and their general craziness. Sometimes I feel kind of boring. Jen and I don’t get in big dramatic fights, we don’t go stomping around Boston getting drunk and having affairs. Mostly it’s pretty nice over here. Every now and then, the calm freaks me out. This nice life, with my sweet wife and son can be a little hard to take. Because this is not who I am.
I was always the fucked up girl who was passed out in the corner. And there is a part of me that finds this new set up disturbing. I will always have the temptation to fuck it all up.
But tonight, we were talking about other people. People we love and people we are related to. We were marveling at their truly messed up behavior.
Jen: Once again, we aren’t insane.
Me: I don’t know if I’d go that far.
Jen: At least we grasp the insanity.
Me: Well, that’s something. Isn’t it?
If you weren’t just a little bit insane, no way we’d be friends.
Same.
From what I can tell, I like you just the way you are. I also like that Jen is around to keep you this way…on this side of the insanity curve.
I think the really effed up people don’t know they’re effed up. That’s my theory and I’m sticking to it.
Law school. You might be a little insane by definition. But it’s a functional insane.
First of all Googs, Virgin’s a fucking lunatic. “A little insane” doesn’t begin to grasp her level of crazy. Second, I always knew you were a little disturbed. I mean, I had to have been drawn to you for more than just your tool belt, right? I guess what I’m saying is that I like everyone in my entourage to have a little edge (in Virgin’s case, two 90 degree angles) of crazy. It makes for a fun time.
In other news, I’m listening to Sam Ronson’s “Built this Way” right now. Did you know it was in Mean Girls, which was the movie where she and Lilo met for the first time?
Wow Will, you are a Lilopedia. I did not know that they met on the set of Mean Girls.
Yes. I know everything about Mean Girls. I can cite pretty much any line from the movie, almost as quickly as I can site WAG, Charmed, and, to a lesser extent, Veronica Mars. I try to be as well-rounded as I possibly can. However, Lilo has fallen off my radar as of late. I think I stopped believing in her powers of seduction ever since she went blonde and skinny. I felt betrayed.
In any case, did Virgin pass on the E-Harmony video? If not, then here it is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-nuuuh1q6QE
Oh, don’t worry. Virgin tripped over herself posting that to my facebook profile.
Funny thing was, I didn’t realize it was actually her at first. I thought, wow, that girl does a really good Lohan impression.
Wow. I thought you were on the Lilo bandwagaon. I guess you fell off a few DUI’s (wait, do you folks call them something else?) ago.
What do you mean by Lilo bandwagon?
As in, you’re not as up-to-date as you should be. Let’s face it, we Californians are born with a subscription to every major tabloid magazine. It’s in our blood.
Oh, I’m ga ga for Ms. Lohan. I was never that interested in her until this whole break up thing happened. I think I didn’t believe that relationship was real. But watching this whole thing, I thought, she’s taking this really hard. And then everyone was so mean to her. And I decided I was on her side.
So it’s all a little recent. And just in time for finals.
So you’re a voyeur then? Hm… I’m slightly appalled and slightly likely to commend you. I mean, I didn’t really gain all that much interest in Ms Spears until after her train wreck and Phoenix-like rise, so I understand. But to be fair, although I did not like Ms. Spears, I did know of her antics and catchy music.
Yes. I am a voyeur not an exhibitionist.
Just look at all the trouble the two of you get into when I go to sleep early and am not around to police you.
Police us or egg us on?
There’s a difference?
Yeah, she’s drunk during one of them. Can you tell me which one?
Since you are forcing me to choose, I would say she is drinking and egging.
Let’s just put it this way: Virgin’s always drunk and on the verge (haha, get it?) of a major meltdown. That’s why she has to police us – it gives her a sense of order in life.
When the two of you gang up on me like this, I feel so loved.
It’s not love, Virgin. It’s called an intervention. We’re trying to save you.
Will and I are heroes. But I only intervene for reality T.V. Where are the cameras?
Amen.